Thursday, July 15, 2004

New-Age-Astral-Vibration Rap
by Steve Webber

I was having an out-of-body experience so I grounded myself and got
centered with the help of my spirit guide, then I almost astral traveled
but the phone rang and I sensed the negative vibrations so I checked
my numerology chart and almost had a primal but my energy was blocked
so I did some bioenergetics and self-parenting and had some flower
essences with oat bran ginseng muffins but my inner child wasn't being
nurtured so I had some frozen yogurt that made me hyper so I did the
relaxation response while listening to my subliminal tape but I was
feeling depersonalized so I did some polarity work, foot reflexology,
a past life regression, rebirthed myself and made an appointment for
a shiatsu, reiki, rolfing, Feldenkrais, Swedish, Japanese deep tissue
massage but I needed to energize my crystals and do some positive
imagery because my visualization techniques and affirmations made
my space feel invaded so to get empowered I got a psychic reading
around the issue of my assertiveness so I could feel my radiance and
have energy for my psychocalisthenics and my inversion swing before my
harmonic brain wave synergy session which makes me more focused for my
actualization seminar and holistic healing class and dream workshop so
I'm clear for my Gestalt/behavioral/cognitive/transpersonal/Reichian/
Jungian/Freudian/Ericksonian session but my aura is weak for my
channeling group so I'll fast till noon to recharge my chakras and I
sense my intuition is high and my cycle is focused so I'll turn on my
ion generator to open up for my neuro-linguistic programming but I need
to have my pyramid balanced before my guided synchronicity meditation
so my cranio sacral therapy aligns me for the fire-walk after my tarot
reading but I need a meaningful relationship to mirror myself so I'll go
to the Intensive Whole Life Earth Rebirth Cosmic Expo Symposium Seminar
Workshop to find someone who is real.

Friday, July 02, 2004

JulAnn: I *heart* it. I love the $3 BJ at the westward Ho